Q: My man isn’t interested in the process. He just likes to do everything quickly and get back to the regular routine. What can I do?
A: Sometimes we all like to get spontaneous “quickie”, when the blood streams through your veins and the desire to possess each other right now overwhelms. It lasts only 7-10 minutes and then you are back to normal. It can be fun on occasion. On the other end, if you always have “quickies” and never long passionate sexual sessions, it could be a sign of a problem. Also I don’t know whether this has been happening for a while or from the very beginning. It’s hard to advise anything without knowing you sexual history with him. So far there are multiple factors why men would go for a “short” sex:
Feeling tired, not having enough sleep;
Feeling stressed, frustrated because of work or business;
Having an erectile disfunction like premature ejaculation (when ejaculation happens sooner than a man or his partner would like during sex);
Feeling disconnected with a partner, sex is more like a chore than a pleasure;
Sex isn’t a priority for him because he is too busy with other things;
Low sex drive;
He might be having an affair and this is why he is not willing to contribute emotionally anymore;
He is too much in his head;
He is simply bored because sex become very predictable.
The best way to save your sex life is to communicate openly with your partner about current situation and how you are feeling. Do not attack him. Be soft and understanding, but in the same time try to let him know that you want to enjoy being intimate with him longer than 10 minutes… Tell him that you miss him, you miss his touch, skin to skin contact, his passionate kisses etc. Inspire him to want to have long passionate sex with you again. If he is too tense, offer him a massage with hot oil or take a shower together and you wash each other. You know your men better than me and you know how to relax him and spark his desire.
It also could be that he had enough of you. Make yourself sometimes unavailable. Create again the areola of mystery around your persona. Maybe you made it so comfortable and predictable for him, that it doesn’t excite him anymore?? At first you need to come up with ideas on how to start having longer sessions. This is where Zoe & Alexandra kit becomes handy. It contains 12 foreplay scenarios. In the form of a game, your suggestions will be accepted rather more like fun than invasive and obliging requests. You don’t even have to tell him you bought a kit. Just use items and ideas it gives you to make the foreplay more thrilling and unpredictable so that his interest in sexual game that you started is constantly high.
